REPORTER QUIZZES BIGWIGS

Cambridge, March 15--A CRIME reuorter this evening interviewed several important personages to get their opinions on the Junior Dance rumor.

"Hush!" the Deans of the University stated, in an interview with a CRIME reporter.

Asked for her reaction to the rumored banning of the Junior Dance, Miss Jane Cowl, Hon. '29, and last year's Prom Girl, said "I hope it is banned. Then no one will ever snatch the wreath from me. I do wish I could play Shakespeare more often, though," she added wistfully.

"No sir, you can't touch that!" shouted Robert Lampoon, noted virtnoso, to a CRIME reporter whom he observed looking quizzically at his picolo. "It's my own," he added, fondling it, "and that's why I didn't dare play at the Union tonight. I'm taking awfully good care of it till St. Patrick's Day. Guess why? Why, it's the Lampoon dinner, celebrates six months peace with the police. Can I sell you a ticket?"

Guiseppe (Dry.) Martini, head barber at the Union, was discussing the decorations there with an assistant when the CRIME reporter entered his "sanetum", "Hey, Choe! Heavy cool-eedge!" he remarked succinctly to his satellite. "Ya, deesa nice day. Shearsa clippas," was his only other comment.

"No," said Colonel Apted, head of the University Division of Scotland Yard, when informed of the proposed dance. "I hadn't heard of it. Thank you. I'll send Detachments 2, 4, and 5a over at once. We can't be too careful of the good name of our College," he whispered to the reporter.