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Those who have found the weather disagreeable this winter will sympathize heartily with Mr. Robert Condit of Miami, Florida, not, however, because weather in Florida has fallen below its usual standards of hotel prospectus perfection, but because the peculiar atmospheric conditions of the last few weeks have prevented Professor Condit, for such is his title, from making a most ambitious long distance flight. Mr. Condit, who sees elevating possibilities in the study of chemistry, has constructed an ingenious, gas-filled contrivance, which will project him permanently into the ether. For his destination, he has chosen rather than the conventional mars or the moon, the planet Venus where conditions are more nearly like those on earth, and more favorable for Professor Condit, whose doctors do not advise too great a change of climate.
But to get on the right side of Venus, he must start before March 6, and although the time may be profitably passed charging admission to his hangar, the Vernean scientist is disturbed by the obstinate weather. When pundits inform Condit that the friction of the air will melt the rocket and likewise the already ardent professor within, he smiles knowingly. When visitors asked him how he would return, it is reported that he answered, "Why cross bridges?" speaking, one presumes, metaphorically. The inhabitants of Miami, however, although they like Mr. Condit, fear he will come back to earth too speedily.
Admittedly the plan is one to enthrall imagination. For some time acquaintances meeting in foreign capitals have remarked that the world is after all, a small place. To contain the tourist whom travel has broadened until he is loquaciously expensive, who gives critical lectures, or pokes things derogatorily with a cane, the world is indeed too small. For him is such a trip designed. But before he and all his ilk can be bundled with the necessary changes of linen into a gargantuan rocket, the contention that so many foreign bodies in space might disrupt the delicately balanced celestial system, must be treated with gravity. Perhaps it is best that Professor Condit should first blaze the trail. Even if others may not immediately follow, it is entirely possible that he may, first Lindbergh like, improve American Venereal relations beyond the wildest claims of companionate marriage.
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