UMPRIE MERRIMAN CONDEMNS FIELDING OF HISTORY NINE

The debacle of baseball as the "great American pastime" took place on the second team diamond Saturday afternoon when the European history students overcame their American rivals by a score of 9 runs to 5. This triumph of culture over mere American "ingenuity" was attested to last night by Professor R. B. Merriman, who served as both base and pitching umpire at the contest.

According to Professor Merriman, the pitching of J. C. Ecker 2G., the European mound ace, has never before been rivalled on a new world diamond. His loose support in the field, it appears, was the only thing which prevented a shutout. This was certainly not exceptional as out of nine files which went into the field, one was caught.

"Outside of the pitching", Professor Merriman admitted, "the game was little more than a farce. The disgraceful way in which the outfielders ran from the ball was equalled only by the quality of the refereeing."