News

Harvard Quietly Resolves Anti-Palestinian Discrimination Complaint With Ed. Department

News

Following Dining Hall Crowds, Harvard College Won’t Say Whether It Tracked Wintersession Move-Ins

News

Harvard Outsources Program to Identify Descendants of Those Enslaved by University Affiliates, Lays Off Internal Staff

News

Harvard Medical School Cancels Class Session With Gazan Patients, Calling It One-Sided

News

Garber Privately Tells Faculty That Harvard Must Rethink Messaging After GOP Victory

TO MY DRUMMING CHUM.

AN ODE AFTER THE MANNER OF SWIFT.

NO WRITER ATTRIBUTED

By One of the Afflicted.

O MY chum!

Hush your drum;

And at ease

Leave me, please.

I shall fly,

I shall die,

Go to grub,

Or the Hub.

Spare my ears,

Cease my fears;

Draw it mild,

For I am growing wild.

You're insane,

It is plain,

O my chum!

For you drum

On the floor,

On the door,

On the stove,

Walls above,

On my chair, -

Everywhere.

"So's a hen,"

You mildly answer then.

This is rot.

You cannot

Get the flam.

You said damn.

And I swear

I can't bear

Any more

Such a bore.

Darn the fuss!

Hear me cuss.

"Right you are,"

Comes over your cigar.

That's enough, -

No more guff, -

You just trot!

Though it's not,

As they say,

A cold day,

You'll get left,

Or bereft

Of your chum.

There, - keep mum!

'Lection o'er,

Then no more

Shall this pest

My quiet room infest.

Want to keep up with breaking news? Subscribe to our email newsletter.

Tags